Look, we all know it’s coming. Life throws punches. Pain is inevitable. It’s not a matter of if you’ll face it, but when. As Joe De Sena, the founder of Spartan races, often talks about, it’s a fundamental part of growth.
And when it hits, there are two kinds of people. Those who crumble, and those who rise. It’s a choice, really. Are you going to let the tough times knock you down and keep you there, or are you going to use them to become stronger?
I remember reading this study from UC Irvine – pretty cool stuff. They found that people who went through some hardship actually ended up with better mental health and were more satisfied with their lives than people who had it easy.
Think about it: no struggle, no strength. No Pressure. No Diamond!
Resilience isn’t something you’re born with; it’s something you build. You get it by facing uncomfortable stuff head-on. You push through, you learn, you grow. You get tougher, and you appreciate the good times way more. I’ve seen it in my own life, big time. It reminds me of that quote:
Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going. ~ Sam Levenson.
Pain is like a forge. It tests what you’re made of. It shows you your grit, and that grit makes you who you are.
One thing that helps me when things get dark: I remember a Stanford study: They found that if you look at stress as a challenge instead of a threat, it actually makes you perform better, mentally and physically. So, next time you’re in the thick of it, tell yourself:
This isn’t breaking me; it’s making me.
The flip side is that if you constantly avoid pain – any kind of pain – you get stuck in this cycle of fear. You avoid things that might actually be good for you because you’re afraid of getting hurt. And that just makes you feel weaker, less capable of handling anything life throws your way.
So, the big question is: when pain comes knocking, are you going to let it define you, or are you going to define it?
Here’s how I try to handle it, inspired by some of Joe De Sena’s philosophy:
- Take control of the story: Instead of “Why me?” ask “What’s next?” Pain is where you prove yourself.
- Use pain as fuel: Turn that discomfort into pure determination. Every obstacle you overcome gets you ready for the next one, and the next.
- Remember your tribe: Pain shared is pain halved. Lean on the people who support you. They’ll help you go further than you ever thought you could.
